I've been looking for the perfect dress for my sister's wedding for ages, something not too formal (because it's not one of those sorts of weddings), but obviously not too casual.
I found myself in a shop yesterday, trying on a bunch of different dresses, but not finding anything just right. I slipped the last one on and studied myself in the mirror. I liked it a lot, but with my bra peeking unbecomingly over the edge of the lacy top, I whipped it off and decided to try it on braless. Despite being rather well-endowed, I figured that the way it was shaped and the ribbon underneath the bust would keep things in place.
I peered through the curtain and, with no one around, I slipped out to check myself in the long mirror. A little risqué for me, I thought, especially since the girls are usually kept firmly in place by a system of ropes and pulleys, but I thought that given the style and cut, I might be able to get away with it, especially if I wore a stole over the top.
I was about to slip back into the fitting room when, out of nowhere, a sales lady appeared. Within the blink of an eye she had cupped my bosom in her hands and exclaimed, "they're marvellous! What you've got, most women would pay to have! Let's put them out there for everyone to see!"
Too gobsmacked to respond, I stood there dumbly as she tightened the shoulder straps (if such a moment was immortalised in comic book form, words such as "hoik" and "yank" might come flying off the page). She then patted her work (ie. my breasts, which were now almost up around shoulder level) with a pleased look on her face, and exclaimed "they're marvellous!"
Despite being stunned over the forwardness of The Sales Lady, My New Best Friend Forever, it goes without saying that I bought the dress.
But as well as having to find myself a stole (just to demure it up a little, so I don't look too scandalous at my sisters wedding), I may have to hire some sort of catcher to follow me around, just in case something falls out.